Remembering Jack

A memorial of my dear brother

The last rays of light on March 19, 2025

I was sitting on our floating home in a calm anchorage of Guadaloupe, looking out over the calm sea as the sun began to set when I learned that my dear brother Jack passed away at 4:50 pm, ending his eight year fight against cancer. The finality made my heart sink. The next morning I woke up realizing how he passed on the eve of the spring equinox, the official beginning to spring.

My brother loved to garden. It was one of his passions in life and I loved watching him make our gardens at the lake so beautiful. It was in service to everyone who came to visit our home. It made us all smile as we looked out the kitchen window at the beautiful blooming flowers and it created a home.

Jack and Karen in our beloved home of Crystal Lake

Jack was someone who taught me how I didn’t have to pay attention to rules. I was four years younger, but we were both middle children, so it was easy for us to be invisible. He taught me how to get away with what I really wanted. To follow my spirit of adventure. To throw caution to the wind and sail into the unknown. To not always do what I was told in life but to listen to my heart, my passion, and my joy.

We were raised in a Catholic family and it would have been easy for me to grow up being “miss goody two shoes.” Jack helped me to see how breaking the rules was really just going outside the box, outside the family, the familiar. Over time I learned how doing so was a way for my soul to experience life more fully. To move into the unknown with curiosity and grace.

Jack, Jody and Jake with Dottie

Jack loved having a tribe. He loved including dogs in his tribe who demonstrated loyalty with unconditional love and affection. He created a beautiful family with his wife Karen and they were all so close.

Jack was someone who didn’t let himself fall into the dysfunctional patterns of our family. He was a peacemaker at heart. He told me how much he recoiled when witnessing any of us arguing. He hated it and demonstrated true love to me in the safety of his warm hugs and affection. Every now and then he would come up to me from behind and start rubbing my shoulders. Kneading the tight knots free! Helping me to let go more, to live and breathe more freely and enjoy life.

Jack was a lover of music and dance! I looked to him for what was cool and hip. When I was old enough, he took me out dancing in New York City. He turned me on to New Wave music with the Talking Heads, David Bowie, Depeche Mode, and Bryan Ferry. Any chance he got, he wanted to play a new band he just discovered for me. He loved music and was really a connoisseur of progressive music.

Thank you Jack! You will forever remain an example of someone who doesn’t shy away from taking risks for the sake of living more fully with laughter, adventure, freedom, play, love and joy .

Life is a journey, a path that we tread,
With ups and downs, twists and turns ahead.
We laugh and we love, we play and we learn,
With friends by our side, life’s a great turn.

We grow from a seed, into a strong tree,
Reaching for the sky, with branches so free.
We make memories, with those we hold dear,
And cherish each moment, year after year.

So, enjoy the journey, and make the most of each day,
And keep moving forward, with laughter and play.
For life is a gift, to be lived to the fullest,
With love in our hearts, and dreams to be multiplied.

“Embrace each day with laughter and love, and make the most of life’s sweet symphony.” — Rama Krishna Rao